Relationships
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Dinners with Ruth: A Memoir on the Power of Friendships
Celebrated NPR correspondent Nina Totenberg delivers an extraordinary memoir of her personal successes, struggles, and life-affirming relationships, including her beautiful friendship of nearly fifty years with Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg.
Four years before Nina Totenberg was hired at NPR, where she cemented her legacy as a prizewinning reporter, and nearly twenty-two years before Ruth Bader Ginsburg was appointed to the Supreme Court, Nina called Ruth. A reporter for The National Observer, Nina was curious about Ruth's legal brief, asking the Supreme Court to do something revolutionary: declare a law that discriminated "on the basis of sex" to be unconstitutional. In a time when women were fired for becoming pregnant, often could not apply for credit cards or get a mortgage in their own names, Ruth patiently explained her argument. That call launched a remarkable, nearly fifty-year friendship.
Dinners with Ruth is an extraordinary account of two women who paved the way for future generations by tearing down professional and legal barriers. It is also an intimate memoir of the power of friendships as women began to pry open career doors and transform the workplace. At the story's heart is one, special relationship: Ruth and Nina saw each other not only through personal joys, but also illness, loss, and widowhood. During the devastating illness and eventual death of Nina's first husband, Ruth drew her out of grief; twelve years later, Nina would reciprocate when Ruth's beloved husband died. They shared not only a love of opera, but also of shopping, as they instinctively understood that clothes were armor for women who wanted to be taken seriously in a workplace dominated by men. During Ruth's last year, they shared so many small dinners that Saturdays were "reserved for Ruth" in Nina's house.
Dinners with Ruth also weaves together compelling, personal portraits of other fascinating women and men from Nina's life, including her cherished NPR colleagues Cokie Roberts and Linda Wertheimer; her beloved husbands; her friendships with multiple Supreme Court Justices, including Lewis Powell, William Brennan, and Antonin Scalia, and Nina's own family-her father, the legendary violinist Roman Totenberg, and her "best friends," her sisters. Inspiring and revelatory, Dinners with Ruth is a moving story of the joy and true meaning of friendship.
Four years before Nina Totenberg was hired at NPR, where she cemented her legacy as a prizewinning reporter, and nearly twenty-two years before Ruth Bader Ginsburg was appointed to the Supreme Court, Nina called Ruth. A reporter for The National Observer, Nina was curious about Ruth's legal brief, asking the Supreme Court to do something revolutionary: declare a law that discriminated "on the basis of sex" to be unconstitutional. In a time when women were fired for becoming pregnant, often could not apply for credit cards or get a mortgage in their own names, Ruth patiently explained her argument. That call launched a remarkable, nearly fifty-year friendship.
Dinners with Ruth is an extraordinary account of two women who paved the way for future generations by tearing down professional and legal barriers. It is also an intimate memoir of the power of friendships as women began to pry open career doors and transform the workplace. At the story's heart is one, special relationship: Ruth and Nina saw each other not only through personal joys, but also illness, loss, and widowhood. During the devastating illness and eventual death of Nina's first husband, Ruth drew her out of grief; twelve years later, Nina would reciprocate when Ruth's beloved husband died. They shared not only a love of opera, but also of shopping, as they instinctively understood that clothes were armor for women who wanted to be taken seriously in a workplace dominated by men. During Ruth's last year, they shared so many small dinners that Saturdays were "reserved for Ruth" in Nina's house.
Dinners with Ruth also weaves together compelling, personal portraits of other fascinating women and men from Nina's life, including her cherished NPR colleagues Cokie Roberts and Linda Wertheimer; her beloved husbands; her friendships with multiple Supreme Court Justices, including Lewis Powell, William Brennan, and Antonin Scalia, and Nina's own family-her father, the legendary violinist Roman Totenberg, and her "best friends," her sisters. Inspiring and revelatory, Dinners with Ruth is a moving story of the joy and true meaning of friendship.
Editorial Reviews
"A genial, likable tone. Totenberg's stories are lively but never go on too long; she appears to reflexively turn the reader's attention to the generosity or small kindnesses of others. She writes, without pretension or self-congratulation, about moments of journalistic triumph of which she has every right to be proud…Her final display of friendship in this book entails laying bare just how frail Ginsburg truly was - and how extraordinary she was to persevere and inspire for as long as she did." – The New York Times Book Review
"Count me among those who rely on NPR reporter Nina Totenberg's crystalline explanations for all things legal, especially Supreme Court arcana - no one is clearer and more incisive…[Dinner with Ruth] is a memoir about Nina Totenberg, a jaunt through her captivating life and career, nose for the jugular, and forthrightness about her joys and sorrows… What's not to enjoy about being in Totenberg's sparkling company for an entire book?"– NPR
"Dinners With Ruth is really three excellent books: a memoir of Nina Totenberg's relatively blessed life; an anecdotal account of Ruth Bader Ginsburg's; and, finally, a paean to the bond of friendship, which, like fine wine, gets better with age." – Star Tribune
"A warm, deeply felt homage to friendship, to what it means to show up and be present for each other, especially in difficult times." – Washington Independent Review of Books
"The over-arching theme of this deeply satisfying, beautifully written memoir, is the incredible power of women's friendships to sustain and enrich our lives as we balance conflicting pressures and persistent barriers, in sickness and in health and despite heart-breaking loss."- ANDREA MITCHELL, NBC News Chief Washington Correspondent and anchor
"Even if the women at the center of the story were not trailblazing boundary-breakers, this would...
"Count me among those who rely on NPR reporter Nina Totenberg's crystalline explanations for all things legal, especially Supreme Court arcana - no one is clearer and more incisive…[Dinner with Ruth] is a memoir about Nina Totenberg, a jaunt through her captivating life and career, nose for the jugular, and forthrightness about her joys and sorrows… What's not to enjoy about being in Totenberg's sparkling company for an entire book?"– NPR
"Dinners With Ruth is really three excellent books: a memoir of Nina Totenberg's relatively blessed life; an anecdotal account of Ruth Bader Ginsburg's; and, finally, a paean to the bond of friendship, which, like fine wine, gets better with age." – Star Tribune
"A warm, deeply felt homage to friendship, to what it means to show up and be present for each other, especially in difficult times." – Washington Independent Review of Books
"The over-arching theme of this deeply satisfying, beautifully written memoir, is the incredible power of women's friendships to sustain and enrich our lives as we balance conflicting pressures and persistent barriers, in sickness and in health and despite heart-breaking loss."- ANDREA MITCHELL, NBC News Chief Washington Correspondent and anchor
"Even if the women at the center of the story were not trailblazing boundary-breakers, this would...
Readers Top Reviews
JFChiBabsM
I loved this book and Nina's narration cover to cover. An inspiration and a fantastic insight into the lives of some of my heroines. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
J Shona
Nina Totenberg and Ruth Ginsburg made their own paths, with enormous consequences for all of us. Totenberg highlights - and describes with lovely details - the support that friendship can provide as we navigate in life. Women, in particular, will love this book but there is much for all of us to learn.
Gayle
I have enjoyed listening to you on NPR for YEARS and I love this back-story with RBG and friends. I have so much respect for you all, the boundaries you upheld, the love and support you gave each other!
Lotusland Lady
Nina Totenberg's reports of the Supreme Court was one of my must listen to segments on All Things Considered on NPR. I had no idea she was such close friends with RBG, and had strong friendships with so many of the other Justices on the Court. She never suggested she had inside sources, just that she was a damned fine, intelligent reporter. I have given this book to two friends who I know will also enjoy it.
rlrmb
It's a good book, and one that should have broad appeal - particularly for women. This memoir is more about Nina than Ruth. One can't help but be impressed at the successful career Nina Totenberg built for herself without even having a college degree. This is a memoir more about friendships in general than just with RBG, and there is a lot of name dropping. One can't help feeling shocked that, despite journalistic ethics, Ms. Totenberg felt comfortable maintaining the friendships that she did -- with people she regularly wrote about - and most disappointingly it made me seriously question NPR's integrity in overlooking and "benefitting" from this practice. There are so many conflicts of interest - it is staggering and reminiscent of the Kennedy era. Yet because she is so intimate with the Supreme Court, she helps it feel more accessible and interesting to the reader. I most enjoyed the section about RBG serving with Sandra Day O'Connor and, despite differing politics, how they supported each other.
